Grandparents should be paid for looking after their grandchildren and given up to two weeks' "granny leave", campaigners have demanded. (The Daily Telegraph)
Grandparents Plus chief executive Sam Smethers said: "Our poll shows that the general public appreciates the important role that grandparents play but most people do not think the Government values this highly enough... It is time to recognise the contribution grandparents make."
Hang on a minute, people. Hang on. I think the proposed national insurance credits are well-meaning, wonderful acts of appreciation. And we know our elders could do with a few bob more, when they’re not winning the lottery, that is; but then, isn't there a risk that looking after one’s grandchildren becomes a job?
There’s an old saying that the reward for being a parent is being a grandparent. Some reward it will be when mum plonks little Johnny on the doorstep of Granny Dogood and says ‘what do you mean you’re having a tea with the girls – I’m busy, and besides it’s what our taxes pay you for!’...
And what happens when flustered mum knocks on the door of Granny Bebad and says ‘mum, could you have Lucy for the day – something’s come up?’ and Granny Bebad say no, she’s not getting paid enough (and rightly so, because Lucy is no longer her cherubic granddaughter but clearly a spoilt little brat – something discovered when mum and dad exploited the paid-for privilege of being a granny and jetted off for a fortnight of child-free holiday in Antigua).
My fear is that joy of the unconditional will be lost in the duties of the institutional - not enforced by law, but applied by family pressure. And although the government is still throwing ideas in the air we have to consider the implications of any form of renumeration. Will grannies be forced to deal with income tax and paperwork? Will accountants’ heads explode (if granny earns a tenner looking after one child for four hours, how much will she earn if she looks after four children for three hours)? Will grandparents be forced into a nappy curriculum, made to plan progress charts and structured educational plans for those in their care, like so many now-retired childminders....? Will grannies be vetted for their families’ extension plans when going for a job – will ‘granny leave’ become a bone of contention in the HR and payroll departments?
According the The Telegraph: Children's Minister Beverley Hughes said most grandparents did not want to be financially rewarded for their contribution to childcare but the Government wants to find ways to do more to value and support their efforts.
Grandparents and Government - both magnanimous. But Grandparents look after children as a favour – a favour that we hope is rewarded with many thanks and trips to department store cafes; if the government wants to thank them, too, then why don’t they top up state pensions across the board, make stamps cheaper (aren’t grannies forever purchasing stamps?) or cut the VAT from pre-packed cold meats and chutney? Or why not just subsidise businesses so they can afford to extend maternity leave so that mums can look after their own kids? Some of us don't have grannies round the corner to help - do we get 'Heaven Credits' for managing on our own?
It’s not that I begrudge grannies and the ‘job’ they do. I think it’s marvellous that some willingly give up their days for a mewling puking poppet when they’ve done the time and should be carving a late career, gardening to talk radio, travelling the world or writing their memoirs. But they can say no, not today. Some may feel they can’t but they actually can. Let’s not put them under pressure levied by proxy by the government’s token gesture, imposed by face-to-face stand-offs with heir own children who might well say: what are you complaining about, you’re getting paid! Don't think this would never happen. Just think of the different demographics, the varying family values, the expectations, the bullies...
Families have their own dynamics, characteristics and behaviours – and I think they should probably be left to organise their own internal relationships and responsibilities.
Should nail technicians receive recognition for their contributions to therapy – I peer into those steamy windows with fascination, watching the client yakkity-yak while the silent masked one nods and paints ‘art’ on the clients’ calcium deposits, which appears to make the clients extremely happy. No. Okay, that’s silly. But what about other unpaid supporters – voluntary charity workers, political party voters, friends who pop over for a cuppa and cake when hubby’s stormed off over a storm in his unwashed work shirt? When does helping out stop and working out begin?
Recently, my friend’s husband took his unwashed work shirts and left for good. I try to comfort her as much as I can and take her kids out to give her time. Maybe I should keep a time sheet....
Dear government, think on. Give us bigger pensions and longer maternity leave, VAT-relief and life bonuses, but don't add any more layers of complication. For when it comes to the word 'family' there is no collective noun.
And like childminders, don’t try to fix what clearly ain’t broke.
Comments